Top five gadgets for fighting aliens

Cowboys-and-aliens Cowboys & Aliens rides into cinemas this month, promising non-stop ranchers versus monsters carnage. Of course, while cowboys might only have a trusty six-shooter to defend themselves, in today's modern age we can think of plenty of other gizmos that would come in handy. Here's our extra-terrestrial crime fighting kit, packed with the finest gadgets to dispatch ET in record time. 


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A smartphone 
It hardly needs saying that, if aliens rode into your town, the first thing you'd reach for is a smartphone. But who would you call? Would anyone believe you? At least with a 3G connection you could look up the appropriate government security agency on Yell.  

A digital camcorder 
If the scoffing copper on the end of a 999 call doesn't believe that aliens have taken over the block, perhaps you'd be better off shooting some footage of said invaders and sending it to news agencies instead – or even posting it on YouTube for maximum eyeballs and impact. Fingers crossed it doesn't turn out to be another Cloverfield.  

A satnav
What good is an alien invader when he doesn't know his way around? A trusty GPS will help pick out the best spot for a showdown. And should the alien prove friendly, you can show him how to get to points of interest. Win-win. It's a morbid thought, but with live traffic updates, you could even avoid the panicked rush of fleeing people, and escape via the empty back roads.  

A tablet 
If weapons aren't going to work, how about wowing other-world marauders with man's finest invention: the trusty tablet computer? Never mind light-speed travel, stick one in their hands and watch as they bow down in awe and start prodding at the touchscreen. How did they make it so thin, they'll wonder. How come the battery life is so much better than a laptop, they'll ask. Is there an app explaining how to take over the human race? Let's hope not, for our sakes.  

A glass of water 
It's about as low-tech as it gets, but it might not be the worst idea in the world. If bullets and slates aren't working perhaps a dousing of good ol' fashioned H2O will end your non-carbon-based life form troubles. It worked in Signs – and let's not forget that HG Wells' aliens in War Of The Worlds were fended off by ordinary bacteria. Good luck, and godspeed.

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